Assertiveness Paper

Assertive Paper When faced with a dilemma at work or at school the way you handle and voice your opinion is crucial in communicating your level of assertiveness. There is a proper way of being assertive rather than seeming aggressive. It takes practice in order to properly accomplish a comprehension of this technique. Becoming better at speaking your mind verbally and nonverbally will allow you to interact as a leader amongst your fellow workers and colleagues. I can be an assertive person when the time is right and the surroundings ask for a certain level of assertiveness to be needed.If I am with a group of people and I disagree with someone’s opinion or point of view of a certain issue I will allow myself to speak my mind without attacking what the other person said. The most important part of being assertive to me is not being aggressive towards others when expressing thoughts. An example would be during my senior year in high school when we were placed into groups and had to discuss our opinion on gay marriage. The conversations were at the most very educated until a person bluntly stated that they believed gay people should never get married because it was disgusting.Surely this person was entitled to their opinion but the was they phrased their response was in an aggressive manner towards anyone who believed otherwise. I responded right away without directly referring to that person with the word you rather than spoke my mind using the word I. My opinion was that people should be allowed to do what they think it is best for them no matter what others might think. If their decision is not affecting anyone else then they are entitled to their own actions and decisions as human beings.Once I said that the person became angry in a way but not because I disagreed with them but rather in the way I formed my response they could not say I was directly meaning it towards them. The verbal messages I tend to always give out when being assertive has to be for the most part to seem sure of what I am saying backing it up with support but at the same time not sounding like I am attacking anyone’s ideas or opinions. Beginning my words with I makes people feel less threatened and allows them to also have an opinion.When the situation requires me to give an order I will be serious and communicate what needs to be done. The nonverbal messages that I give off when being assertive is to maintain eye contact with the person. This is really important to me because it lets the other person know you are serious and expect what you are telling them to be understood and also taken into consideration. My body posture when doing so is standing upright without moving around or making a lot of hand movements.I try to keep a steady posture which allows the person to stay focused on my message. What I consider to be doing well while being assertive are speaking with a direct tone to the subject in matter while maintaining eye contact. When beginning my message the first word I tend to use is I in order to stay away from people believing they are being blamed or accused. I refrain from telling people your wrong or that is not the way to do something unless it is required of me to do so in certain situations.The way that works the best when communicating a solution to a problem or an approach is to have a sense with the person that what your are saying is a good way but leaving the window open for them to have an opinion as well. I would like to improve myself in the area of giving speeches in front of people to seem very confident. I am not a bad public speaker but I tend to get nervous when doing so for a long period of time. I have tried practicing in front of the mirror speaking and it works out great but it is not the same as actually being in front of many people.That’s what I need more practice in order to be looked at as very assertive when giving a speech. Assertiveness is a learned trait that we all must be aware of and practice in our everyday lives. This quality will help you all through out school and work. It will also better your relationship with friends and family. Being confident and believing in yourself is an important attribute that must go hand in hand with being assertive. Communicating with proper grammar and adjacent nonverbal cues will allow you to be taken serious and provide a level complete with the perfect balance of a great assertive person.